Posted: July 2, 2025
A WEDDING on JUNE 4, 1944
IN THE KOVNO GHETTO, LITHUANIA
By Dr. Ettie Zilber, ASU OLLI Lecturer
Wait, what? There were actual marriages taking place in the ghettos of Eastern Europe? Weren’t Jewish marriages, pregnancies, and births illegal under the Nazi laws… and punishable by death?
Well, love is a human need. We need love; we want love; we seek love; and we wish to give love. And, the human emotion of love does not differentiate between good times and bad times, turbulent times and tranquil times, or between war times and peace times. Love takes place in the strangest places … including in the ghettos and concentration camps during the Holocaust years.
Indeed, my mother and father found each other and fell in love in the Kovno Ghetto. Events that led up to the wedding included the Kinder Aktsia (children’s round up) on March 27-28, 1944. On those two horror-filled days all the children and the elderly were violently removed from the Ghetto to be killed. The Ghetto was left in a state of utter horror and depression. And, soon thereafter, the Soviet Baltic Offensive began its approach into Lithuania. The Ghetto residents knew that the war would soon turn against the Nazis.
It was at this dangerous time that my parents, Zlata Santocki and Liova Sidrer, decided to get married. And, despite the prohibitions, they wanted to have an official Jewish marriage ceremony. My grandfather, Yankel Santocki, asked the famous Rabbi Oshry to conduct the ceremony. Because of the mortal danger involved in holding this marriage ceremony, my parents’ friends stood guard around their little ‘shack’ in the Ghetto.
I wrote about the lead up and aftermath to this wedding in my book “A Holocaust Memoir of Love and Resilience”.
http://getbook.at/Zilber
It has now been 81 years since that fortuitous union, and my sisters, our children and grandchildren will be commemorating that event on June 4.
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Dr. Ettie Zilber is an author, educator, speaker, and board member of the Phoenix Holocaust Association. Her long and varied career in international schools has offered her a first hand view of the needs of school constituents, including host country authorities, staff, parents, students, administration and school boards. She is passionate about sharing her experience, research and strategies with communities worldwide, and assisting them to thrive in a multicultural and multilingual world
If you would like to invite Dr. Zilber to speak to your community or organization, write to her at aholocaustmemoir@gmail.com
